The port is in. The appointments have been scheduled. The drugs have been prescribed. Ok….GO!
Yesterday, I got a port put in. Although I’ve only seen what it looks like all bandaged up, it’s a lot smaller than I was expecting. Rather than the giant ugly extra terrestrial I had imagined, it’s more like a little baby alien…which I’m totally ok with. I think I’ll fondly call it Spike. Of course, I have my reasons (these are in no particular order):
- Because it reminds me of someone naming a cute, cuddly little puppy “killer” or “rex”. The juxtaposition kills me.
- Because it’s going to be poked with approximately 1.48j89 million needles between now and the end of summer.
- Because it kind of feels like a giant spike inside my chest at the current moment.
Appropriate? I thought so, too.
I also got the game plan from my oncologist and we’re getting right down to biznass. Chemo starts next Wednesday, April 10th. I’ll have 8 cycles of treatment once every 2 weeks for the next 16 weeks. The first 4 treatments will be a combination of Adriamycin and Cytoxan, more commonly referred to as “the red devil”. Eeeek. I’m not sure whose idea it was to start calling something that is going to be injected your body and supposedly heal you, the red devil, but I can’t pronounce the real names, so I’m just going to go with it. The latter 4 will be another type of chemo drug called Taxol. I had taxol last time around…so it’s going to kind of be like a reunion. Oh the memories…
That also means I have 20 days, max, of having hair. I’m not thrilled about being bald, or the thinning eyebrows and lashes. However, I AM thrilled about not having to shave or wax my hairy Italian body all summer. That’s the silver lining, people…there’s one in every situation. The one thing that kept me from looking completely sickly and slightly normal last time I lost all my hair was the fact that my eyebrows didn’t fall out. Eyebrows are a big deal. Don’t believe me, check out this website. Word on the street is that if you put Latisse on your brows and lashes, they won’t ALL fall out. I’m going to give it the old college try…
One other thing I’m not so thrilled about…my kids. No, I don’t have children. And I’m not anywhere near a point in my life where I can even picture a little Talia running around (even though she would undoubtedly be gorgeous and hilarious). Let’s be real, I can’t even take care of a plant. I killed a cactus last month. I didn’t even think that was possible. Yet, we young and supple ladies with cancer not only have to worry about kicking cancer ass and looking good while doing it, we also need to worry about our unborn babies. Wtf? Right?? So, I’ll be getting a lupron shot on Monday, which is supposed to protect my baby makers (ovaries) while I’m going through treatment. Either way, children or no children, I don’t want the choice taken away from me, so lupron it is.
To everyone who has already read, listened, responded, sent cards, letters, gifts and flowers–one love!! My house looks like Gidas Flower Shop on Forbes Avenue. It’s quite lovely. I’m so surrounded by love I can’t help but smile.
Until next time…peas,